Person to Person   Leave a comment


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I had a fabulous conversation with a friend over coffee this morning.  We were discussing the situation in Syria and all the elements involved in it.  During the conversation, I stated that often we have conflict because people do not have knowledge into the background of a person or a group of people.  We do not understand what has occurred over time that cause the individual or individuals to respond and act in manner which we see.  My friend asked how we might get a handle on this and we came to the agreement that it takes person to person conversation.

Since that discussion, I have been thinking a lot about various situations where person to person contact would create a different dynamic.  There are some key points to keep in mind as conversations happen:

  1. You need to listen as well as you talk.
  2. You need to go into the conversation wanting to learn.
  3. You need to realize that you may still disagree but you will have a much different understanding regarding why.
  4. You need to not prepare to prove them wrong.
  5. You need to not have a goal of changing them.
  6. You need to remove labels and view the person as a person.
  7. You need to be willing to open yourself to them and that goes beyond just words.
  8. You need to remain in conversation and not arguments.
  9. You need to reflect on the conversation afterwards.

I am convinced that this is a vital to making a difference in how to deal with conflicts.  Maybe if more individuals practiced this approach, we would live in a much different world.


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